changel18

It's almost over.

Tue, 27 Feb 2007 12:06:29 GMT

Exams start tomorrow.. 3days of hell nalang. then it's all OVER. Woah... i can't feel it.. oh well. Goodluck to me.. it's Trig tom. Uh-oh.

Someone told me today that i ws different daw?.. is it true? tell me please? how will i know if i don't even know what's different about me? malamang i can't figure it out myself kasi im used to being me?.. diba. so there... It really made me think when i found out. :c i don't want to be like this.. i want to be my normal self again.. waaah! help me.. :c

I miss everything.. i just do. Damn you.

SOTD: I dare you to move..
I DARE YOU.

Friendship.

Mon, 26 Feb 2007 12:51:13 GMT

Today was a very useless but productive day.. well usless in the sense that we had NO SUBJECTS. as in NONE. we just filmed for El Fili the WHOLE DAY. and i was wearing the Vestments the whole day.. haha. katawa.. i hope we finish.. you can do it maika.

I also realized so many things today, first of all i realized who my real friends are, and the friends who really care for me.. i feel bad because it took something this stupid for me to actually realize it.. you know who you are. im sorry if i did not listen to you.. i promise that i will do my best to change. thank you for always being there for me and for caring for me.. I LOVE YOU. i really do.. yun na yun eh.. Treasure your friends. they will be the ones who will be there for you and the ones who will never leave you when a stupid boy comes along and breaks your heart.. trust me.
i was in denial, i know that that was the real reason but i did not want to believe it at first. But now i know.. and i had to learn the hard way. im sorry.

sana. yun lang yun..

When you love, they don't always have to love you back..
love is fighting without knowing how to win.
and suddenly i becoming part of your PAST.

my weekend

Mon, 26 Feb 2007 12:41:16 GMT

Friday, i had tutor so i stayed in school till 7 pm. We had to finish our talaban papers so we just kept ourselves busy with that, then we had to print over 60 plus pages so coco brought her printer to school.. haha. kakatawa.. then after tutor there was practice in maika's house till 9 pm then after i went to metrowalk for my sisters victory party.. i made pa henna in my finger and drank vodka cruiser with trish and camille. Hehe i was super sleepy na so i went home at like 11 something..
THE NEXT DAY..
Saturday, i woke up at around 10, then i had tutor at 1:30-3:30 in Renaissance then i went home to meet with my mom then i made pagawa na my ball dress.. oh yeah and i have a date na. hehe.. there.. then i went home and had a facial at around 9 pm. super late na kasi naunahan ako... then after. just stayed home and slept early again..

Sunday, i woke up at around 8 am then went to Subic, just me my brother my mom and dad. [now i know how it feels to be 2 kids in the family.. quite boring.] We wanted to taste the pancake burger in Jolibee so we bought, but.. it tasted so bad so we went to Mcdo to buy sausage Mcmuffin.. [wala talagang tatalo sa mcdo.] haha.. then i slept.. when i got to Subic i looked at some hotels for my DEBUT. hehe.. there were really nice hotels by the beach.. i can see it now. haha.. im so excited. Then we went to my Uncle Jun's beach resort.. super nice there. i will take my class there nga for class outing eh.. im so excited.. then i slept again and then when i woke up.. we ate late luch in cafe xxpreso we ordered the super big one and thought we could finish it.. but no. di namin na ubos.. so we took it home.. haha. Then we made pa massage in TonTons massage.. haha. sarap.. then went shopping for chocolates and boardshorts. yipee.. oh yeah we went to mass but when we got there it was already the concecration.. so sorry God. :( there.. then we left subic at mga 7 something then i slept again.. Fun times. Got home at around 9:30? ish.. there. That was my weekend.. fun noh?

*Remeniscing...

Im not myself today.

Thu, 22 Feb 2007 13:19:08 GMT

I was kind of not myself today, i was quiet. That's my opinion im just not sure about what they think. We had Our grad song competition today, and guess what.. WE WON!! wohoo.. Go 4A. 4A IS LOVE once again. It was quite funny, we are so in denial that we won that when they anounced that our section won, there was silence for like 5 secs and then that's when we all reacted. It was so funny.. We really thought another section would win but wow, there we won. Congratulations to MICHELLE CAMITAN who made the lyrics and ELISE LIM who made the tune. Good JOB guys.. Grabe.. in denial talaga. ayun.. what else happend today? School was a BORE once again.. and i really am starting to hate school. 1 week nalang and it's all OVER. I can't wait.. but actually to be HONEST. i will miss my school and the people around.. you know. them.. kahit na MAGULO ANG MUNDO sa POVEDA, for sure she will be missed. Im gonna miss hanging out in the covered walk, the airconed canteen, MANG BAGUIO, the "field" that looks like a desert na may little prince, the driveway, the little theater, the AVR, the gym na walang aircon, the super dirty tables by the covered walk, Mang Ado, the dead plants, Saint Pedro Poveda's Head by the stairs, the teachers syempre, and everything else that makes POVEDA, Poveda.

Okay, im pissed and tierd and shitty right now. UGH. today is not my day.. wala na nga tuluyan pang nawala. PUTCHA. WTF? i hate this day.. EVERYDAY IS HATE DAY.

can't wait till it's all OVER.

SOTD: O kay bilis naman maglaho ng pagibig mo sinta,

yet another shitty day.

Wed, 21 Feb 2007 12:06:40 GMT

okay, another day has passed. We had our food service functIon today, we got an excellent. horray for us. Good job 4a!! we did it.. My parents went, It was super laSt min. Sana nagustuhan nila Yung fOod pingahirapan namn yUn. anyway.. Sorry my parents came, i wanted you to come. sorry.. [you will get it.. if you think it's you.] There, then we had grad song practice until 6 then i had tutor from 6-7 haay.. i've been so tierd lately.. i need to rest. UGH. can you imagine, we only have less than 30 days before school ends? We had our last SPIRITUALITY elective today.. it was so sad. We talked about Lent, since lent is about letting go Mrs. Borja was saying that we all have to let go.. letting go of the people you love and people who are most important to you. Yes, i believe this is true.. LET GO. JUST LET GO. it's the right thing to do, then again.. who knows? its so sad that there will be people i won't have to see ever again? Just when everything is about to end, that's when we all start getting close, it's just like saying you will only know the value of a person when that person is already GONE. [so sad...] so there.. that's my life. im slowly learning to let go, im getting there. Don't worry.. oh yeah, i played basketball today.. i was able to shoot one. YEY. hehe.. there.. Im going to miss my batch and my friends and my teachers and maybe my school. Still smiling.. *hug* so confused... iHATEthisfeeling. *umabot pala wifi dito.. galing. SOTD: Paalam na, aking mahal.. kay hirap sabihin.

tired.

Tue, 20 Feb 2007 13:16:22 GMT

IM so DRAINED. UGH. But im still living..

I stayed in school till 7 pm today, i think im gonna faint na.

Food service function tom.. and Ash wednesday mass.

I NEED A BREAK!! before i die.. ugh.

IM happy basta masaya ka... *hug*

Today and the days before.

Mon, 19 Feb 2007 14:14:29 GMT

To start this entry i would like to say..
I LOVE AND ADORE URBANDUB!! that really made my friday all worth it..

okay, so saturday was enciende.. it was fun, because URBANDUB PLAYED! i was in the front and center,screaming my lungs out trying to get to you.. hahaha! no but really, super screaming.. I WAS SUUUPPERRRR HAAAPPPYYY!!!! i went home at like 11 ish because it have UST interview the next day, can i just say that i overslept nung friday.. when i got home i was suppose to go to poveda at around 6:30.. but i woke up past 7 na. haha. oh well.. i was too tierd.

So come Saturday, i woke up at 7 AM left my house at around 7 something, i got to UST mga past 8. Waited in line till mga 8 something got it at around 9?.. waited again, i got interviewed at 11? imagine how long i waited, then the interview only lasted for about 10 mins. The people i was with are like from schools i don't really know.. but they were really nice. I think i will study there na.. BS-SPEED. (i think..) haha. Your looking at the new teacher for SPECIAL CHILDREN. kasi special ako so i can relate to them.. haha! then when i got home.. i slept again. haha then bloss went to my house to do our PE. and C.L project.. Then went to Tito Jinggoy's party in Zirkoh. Saw so many celebs.. haha. there.

Sunday naman, woke up at 2pm then went to metrowalk cause mom had a childrens party.. hehe then went to mass at 6:30 then we waited for the dragon dance shizz.. then we had dinner in GREEN MARIS. sarap.. then there got home at 11. then SLEPT.

Today naman, normal day.. LAB EXAM=FAIL. im going to sing for our grad song on thursday, ugh. then we have to finish filming for EL FILI. I had tutor today, i was super nosiy. haha. oh well. Then math test tom, and i haven't memorized my formulas.. okay. IM SO TAMAD NA.

UGH. OKAY, so there.. Bloss said i looked happy today? HMM. i really don't know why, maybe because.. im trying to be OPTIMISTIC And NOT BITTER ANYMORE. I THINK.. im working on it. hehe.

SMILE.

QOTD: more like song of the day.. : Our forever has been torn apart
Is this the beginning of our last dance? I love you, embrace.. so much tighter this could be our last together.

SMILE. *HUG HUG* i miss hugs.. i want a hug now. :(

What a day.

Thu, 15 Feb 2007 14:30:40 GMT

First off, i was late today. AGAIN. lagi na akong late.. grabe. di ko matake. okay, labo..

Then we had a filipino quiz na for sure binagsak ko.. GRABE. Everyday just gets suckier and suckier. I HATE IT. UGH. Tomorrow's ENCIENDE. i was fine with not going, but looks like i will. It's also elections tomorrow. GOODLUCK TO MY SISTER. haaay..

I miss everything. If only i can turn back time, i would. DAMN.

Why can't things just go back to normal...

QOTD: My mind says i don't care. My heart says i do.

Hearts Day. I LOVE YOU.

Wed, 14 Feb 2007 15:23:49 GMT

First of all i would like to greet EVERYONE a HAPPY VALENTINES DAY! i don't want to be bitter especially to those who have special someones.. unfortunately I DON'T have one.. But it's OKAY. Im still living..
anywhoo...
I HATE SCHOOL. i miss people.. and YOU.

To be Honest iv'e been very bitter about this day.. i called this day THE HATE DAY. I don't know why but there really is something about this day that makes me hate it so much, except the fact that I got a note from Lorna and Marichi, A paper Flower from Mermaid (Because REAL ROSES DIE). I AGREE. Chocolates from Tam, 3 lollipops from Ellle, A pillow Heart from Amanda, Kisses from Chi, Nips from Ms. Cohmbz, A rose from My Dad, And a Card from my Mom. Seems allot but it's like there is still something missing, or Someone. Whoever that person may be.. Im sure he's happy.The right thing to do today is to be happy for people who have special someones.. Okay, honestly Im kinda Jealous, but im trying to wait and to be patient. There is someone out there for all of us, I got this quote from ches that says.. " When God tells you to wait, usually it's something better." Something like that. Sometimes it's Hard to wait for the RIGHT one. If there really is a "RIGHT" one, but would you rather have someone and get HURT? or wait, and feel HAPPY?. Hmm.. so there.
What else can i say, nothing, well it's my parents aniv tom and i still have nothing for them, my dad was so sweet he asked the people from designer blooms to send roses to my mom in the table while we were eating dinner.. so sweet. While i was going around Metrowalk i noticed almost everyone had Roses. It's so sweet. Oh well, Life Goes on, valentine's will be over in a few hours, thank GOD. I really wanted this day to end already.. I don't want to be sad anymore. :(

Mark this day, Next year Valentines day will be the BEST VALENTINES EVER. [I wish.. Libre Mangarap.]
To everyone who has that special someone, Be happy today. SMILE, YOU ARE LOVED. To those who don't [LIKE ME..] let's just wait. He will come, maybe he's still finding his way so that in that moment you meet him, it will be perfect and maybe it can last FOREVER. Let's stop being bitter.. [ or am i talking to myself..] Let's try to be optimistic [me again..] WE DON'T NEED A BOY TO COMPLETE US.

I LOVE YOU 4A! a BIG HUG to all. And to all a Goodnight. Happy Valentines day, Maligayang araw ng mga puso, Alegre Corazon day. LABO. haha..

Special mention to my Valentines BLOSSOM, and CHES.

i only want you happy, even if it's not with me.
QOTD: I did not stop loving you, i just stopped showing it. [Thanks to Aina, and ches for this quote.]

Nothing lasts FOREVER

Mon, 12 Feb 2007 13:09:23 GMT

NOTHING LASTS FORVER.

wow it's been a long time since i last updated my LJ, and this is what im writing about. haaay..

NOTHING LASTS FOREVER. at first i refuse to believe this, but now i've come to realize that, yeah.. nothing lasts forever. It's another sad fact of life. Sucks for me i had to experience this now. Just when everything was turning out to be okay, just when i was willing to believe this line, it all happens. It all has to happen so fast and i hate it. This is one reason why it's really hard to be in a relationship it's the FEAR of it ending, that's what sucks. I myself am afraid to commit, because if your relationship does end, think of the friendship and everything you've been through. Swerte mo lang kung nagbreak kayo and everything is still the same, for sure there will be a little difference. and swerte mo rin kung friends pa kayo after what happend to you. It's sad. Why can't everything just be okay, why does it all have to end? why.. that's the worst part of living, EVERYTHING HAS TO END. Why can't they just stay the same, why can't everything be happy? Damn.

I miss you, you know?.
Always and Forver, Babe.

QOTD: Remember what i said. Notihing has to end.

DAMN. the world is killing me.

Tue, 19 Dec 2006 11:31:59 GMT

Yesterday was fun, HAPPY BIRTHDAY YANNA!
except for my parents watching my every move. I just don't know what to do anymore. damn. i hate this..

IT'S REALLY KILLING ME.

come with me to a place where you and me could be, cause where we are now it's YOU and not ME.

im sorry..
ALWAYS AND FOREVER

another day has passed

Sat, 02 Dec 2006 17:17:04 GMT

one day, another day, another ordinary day no different from the others.

i had cotillion practice today, we finally finished our whole dance. I'm actually quite excited for the debut haha. Practice was kinda awkward with you know who there.. haha X_X pero okay lang haha.

Then we went around lang.. i am currently in metrowalk. Drank 2 margaritas haha. Been drinking allot lately. pero with my parents. Maybe im depressed. But NOT. haha

I MISS YOU. i hope your okay. Im sorry i couldn't be there with you now. Im with you in spirit haha. parang patay na ako. Anyway, there Monday na naman yuck. IWW. oh well LIFE GOES ON.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!! I LOVE YOU.

weird

Fri, 01 Dec 2006 12:06:58 GMT

its weird how you are with people.. especially if all of a sudden there's a sudden STOP.
you tend to miss that person because you guys were "attached" to each other.

Well, sometimes things are better left unsaid.. it's normal to miss someone.. it's normal to fall.. it's normal everything is just normal.. but STOP PRETENDING that everything is okay even if they are really not. Stop making me belive that there is nothing wrong with us when there really is. Please. tell me the truth? is it me?..

If it's me? im sorry. I did not mean to hurt you.. ang kapal ko.

But I don't want to lose you too. Please. Our friendship matters to me.

I LOVE YOU.

you know who you are.. I miss the old days Back when we were CLOSER.

im fine.

Thu, 02 Nov 2006 14:08:45 GMT

sometime it is better to be happy for other people. It's better to care for them, its bettter to let them know you are there, even if you know they won't be there for you. im happy you are happy. always takecare. i miss you.

smile like you mean it, but deep inside your hurting.
once again, I HATE BEING RIGHT.

cherish the moment

Fri, 13 Oct 2006 14:50:44 GMT

today was fun.. except... choti is leaving..:(
around 3:30 choti called and asked me if i wanted to go to galle.. i was so happy because i would see him before he left. I enjoyed every second i spent with him. We were able to "bond" for awhile. But when he had to go, i felt so sad. I WAS GOING TO MISS HIM. :( at least we had our moments and memories *wink wink*. It sad when they say that people always leave, but at least he went back, Even if it was not that long. I saw other people in galle, i was able to bond with my friend. It was fun, we weren't able to talk much though but it was fun.

Goodbye choti, keep in touch im going to miss you..:( haaay....

i will wait until there's nothing else to wait for..

Wed, 27 Sep 2006 06:18:54 GMT

NO CLASSES TODAY! hurray,
but i had to go to my talaban shizz. Damn. but it's okay.

You know i realized that it hurts to wait. especially when the person you are waiting for does not even know it. DAMN. you knw what else hurts? when the one you love likes someone else. There's this line from a song and it says " I only want you happy even if it's not with me" and that's how I feel right now. as long as he's happy then i will also be happy for him diba? that's just how life is and it sucks. BIG TIME.

so you, whoever you are know that I am always here for you. and im happy that you are HAPPY.